For the past few weeks, my oxygen has been below 90% several times a day. There is a possibility that I will be back on oxygen, at least while I sleep until I can have a sleep study done to ensure my oxygen is not dropping overnight.
The Long COVID has been a significant setback. It’s good that I can work with a team of specialists and challenging at the same time. It’s not fun to navigate all these different symptoms and it’s a lot of work, not just managing my stress levels and expectations, but being willing to be mindful of my energy, pacing myself, and doing many of the same things I was doing a year ago during my recovery.
It’s good to have people who can review what I did in my recovery, particularly when I was working, who can point out what the contributing factors likely were and how I can avoid them. But so irritating that mitigating those contributing factors means not doing things I really would like to be doing.
Yesterday, I sat and just wrote some things that were coming to my heart and mind. It didn’t go the way I expected it to go, but I process as I write so that’s never really a surprise.
One of the things that came out as I wrote was that life is like powerlifting. In lifting, training is not exclusively about the time in the gym, it is about everything you do when you leave the gym – attitude, mindset, recovery, hydration, nutrition, rest, cardio, non-lifting movement, and activity.
Then, there are the competitions. It’s on the platform at the comp that you see what you can do, where you need to put in more work, and where you’re rocking your training. Comps are both exhilarating and exhausting. After a competition, you need time to recover. On average it took me 2-3 weeks to get back to being able to lift my best after a competition, and about a week to get back to mental and emotional normal.
I loved the comps even though they were hard, whether I failed a lift or hit it. I always knew it was just giving me more information to enhance my training in and out of the gym.
What God asked me in all this writing is “What if you thought about life like this? What if all of life is training and then the “rough” spots are like a comp – they show you what needs some attention in your routine – where is your alignment off, where is your stance incorrect, what in your mindset and approach needs to change? What if you got excited about the hard things, the obstacles because you see them just like getting on the platform and lifting in a competition, where you’re showing the outcome of your ongoing training without the fear of failure because there, a failure just means you’re putting in the effort? Could you get as excited about the hard stuff, the challenges, the obstacles if you adopted that mindset?”
James 1:2-4 2 My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.
This verse really irritated me until this conversation with God. I counted the comps as all joy. I looked forward to them and anticipated putting my training to the test because I knew that the more I competed, the more “perfect” my training in and out of the gym would be.
To look at life this way – with the hard seasons as just opportunities to make adjustments and grow more into the image of Christ, more into the woman God created me to be…well, that’s kind of exciting. It means every time something comes at me, I can come out of it with more information about how to realign with God’s heart, and I can see what’s working and how it’s strengthening me.
My word going into 2023 is “nevertheless”.
Things may kind of suck right now NEVERTHELESS I believe God has me. NEVERTHELESS, I believe He has already made a way. NEVERTHELESS, I will praise Him, trust Him and find joy and awe in the midst of the challenges.
Things may be disappointing and frustrating right now, NEVERTHELESS, I choose to look at it from an eternal perspective and count it all joy because this testing of my faith will produce fruit to the glory of God.
I may not see what He’s doing or how He’s going to come through NEVERTHELESS I know He’s working on my behalf and He will not fail. Everything He intends for me will come to pass as I continue to hold fast to the One Who holds me.
I may not be going into 2023 in the place I had envisioned last December NEVERTHELESS I am going into it with joy, hope, and anticipation that I will continue to see the goodness of God in the land of the living, trusting that He will do exceedingly abundantly above all I dare ask, think, or imagine.
And to anyone else who is feeling a little disillusioned, down, disappointed, frustrated, depressed, or whatever else you may be feeling right now – I pray that the God of hope will fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit, that you may be comforted and your hearts strengthened to step with confidence into this new year, anticipating His faithfulness, His grace, and His divine strategies guiding you day by day. I pray that He will show you the difference your presence makes in the lives of those around you and that He will help you redefine success, impact, and influence so that you begin to see your life from His perspective. That you will see Him redeem the time, bring dreams to life, and provide opportunities for you to use your gifts and talents in new and unexpected ways as doors open before you and fear bows to His perfect love lavished upon you day in and day out.
Happy New Year!
